This is the weekend to overdose on superlatives: the Great Cleveland Bicentennial Birthday Bash!

And "great" is just one of the super-words being used. Others include "Spectacular" and "Fantastic" and "Mammoth" and "Magical" and, well, pick one and someone likely has used it or will use it to describe one or some of the many events happening from Friday through Monday, July 22.

Try this: more than one million people are expected in the Flats during the three days of Celebration 200!

That many folks coming to one area leads to some other-side-of-the-coin superlatives, too:

"Monster crowds."

"Mammoth traffic jams."

"Gridlock on the river."

But efforts are being made to control those things, even though a crowd of that size will be a problem, and no argument about that. The birthday party in the Flats is the big draw, of course, but there are other events, too, among them, the Indians are in town and there are sold-out Kiss concert performances at Gund Arena.

The hope is that many will park away from the active entertainment venues and walk or take public transportation. Some streets will be closed depending on crowds. Parking in the Flats could be a problem.

RTA has a full load of buses and trains ready to haul folks around, including the new Waterfront Line's trips from Terminal Tower to the Flats and Muny parking lot. One note: the Waterfront Line will stop its runs into the Flats at 8 p.m each weekend night because of crowd safety concerns. When crowds thin out, those Waterfront Line trains will run again each night.

The river gridlock threat will be met with restricted and, at certain times, prohibited recreational boat use of the Cuyahoga River.

Mayor Michael White says the whole party is a family affair and the city plans to do all it can to be sure that families enjoy it. That brings up another superlative: "zero tolerance" of booze abuse and/or rowdiness. Police will be all over the place.

Okay...so much for that.

The big ball is about to begin!

One of the biggest events will be the dedication on Friday and opening to the public on Saturday of the Great Lakes Science Center. This monster house of experiments and exhibits is a superlative unto itself: an indoor tornado, aliens among us, the "Bridge of Fire"-- those all are among more than 350 hands-on exhibits. And the huge Omnimax Theater that already is up and running isn't even counted in the list.

There'll be 12 stages of entertainment throughout the Flats.

Krazy Kraft--those are floating milk cartons--will race on the river for the 12th year.

Kind of a Baywatch on the Cuyahoga.

A parade of illuminated boats will sail in the Parade of Lights for the 13th year, with Bob Hope as parade marshal.

The biggest light show will be the lighting of the bridges in the presentation of "Cleveland-City of Bridges."

Fireworks will go off each night. Choirs will sing. Original music will be played.

The weekend ends with the Cleveland Orchestra playing, and accompanying actress Debra Winger as she reads a letter from the women of Cleveland of 1896.

"We bequeath to you a city of a century, prosperous and beautiful and yet far from our ideal," that letter from 100 years ago reads to the women of the city 100 years later.

"How are things with you?" the letter asks.

Something to think about on our 200th birthday?

Oh, yeah: Happy Birthday, Cleveland.

OTHER BICENTENNIAL STORIES by John Herrington

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